Бесплатный фрагмент - From the real life of Flowers, People and other Creations

1. Testament of Butterfly

Aw, how nice it is sometimes to do nothing! Especially the idleness outside of the city. Somewhere in the field. Alternatively, in the mountains. Or on the banks of the river. Or on the banks of a river irrigating a mountain field. Exactly! The ideal place as it should please all nature lovers. Sitting on a pebble heated by the sun and admiring all that is so lacking in the stone jungles of a modern city. Being enamored with a blade of grass, an ant, a spider’s web (perhaps it’s good that stone jungles lack it), a flower, a butterfly. Especially with the butterfly. For some time now, I have a special attitude to it. I have it not since I learned some terrible things from its life. It is not since a dilapidated skeleton, or to be more precise a caterpillar, fell out of a butterfly wardrobe, or to be more precise a cocoon! Yes, yes! Creepy crawly furry and horned caterpillar with poisonous black and orange spots on its back is a butterfly in childhood! Did you know about that? Moreover, you knew and were silent…. And continued to admire this flower fluttering over the flower? Hats off to the unconditionality of your love! As well as I hope, you guessed it is a joke.

To be serious, I really have a special attitude to butterflies for some time now. Not that I used to dislike them before and now it is contrary. So as for sure, the point is not that I used to love them before and now I feel an acute dislike. No. I have always liked butterflies. In any form. Drawn butterfly. Marzipan in shape of butterfly. Origami-butterfly. In any form, except pinned to the cardboard. However, once upon a time… I began to like them even more. I think I will share about it with you…

It happened on a stone heated by the sun, located on the border of a lawn near the bank of a mountain river. It was at the hour of meditative idleness called off-city “outdoor recreation”.

I sat on a pebble, took warm sunbaths for my sides and bones. I admired the creation. I admired the Creator. I prayed. I meditated. I saw a fluttering cabbage butterfly. Or a white butterfly. Sorry, I am not the best at entomology. It was modest, monochrome, through my sunglasses (the rudiment of a city dweller), the color was white or yellow — was hard to descry. If look inattentively, it could be confused with a little piece of paper, randomly tossing under the gusts of wind. However! How pleasant it is to the eye! Especially at the end of spring! Its flight is like a statement: winter is over! Therefore, I admired this statement on a piece of paper, and thoughts were running, rushing, tripping over one other:

What are butterflies for? What is the practical usefulness? Is it flowers pollination? If so, they are much less effective than bees. (Much less? What a turn!) Moreover, what are bees for? What are flowers for? Is it to feed the butterflies? Or is it to feed the bees? For they in their turn could feed us, people with fragrant sweet allergenic honey? In addition, what are orchids for? Whom do they feed? I wish I could try orchid honey! Does it exist at all? Or orchids devour those who try to partake it? And what are all kinds of predatory sundews and other amazing plants for? What if both the flowers and the butterflies are in order to please the human eye? To give someone aesthetic pleasure? Someone like me? And what I am for? What is a human being for?

Here the Scripturists, people of books and scholars, profound experts-theologians will unanimously answer: to praise God and enjoy fellowship with Him. They are undeniably right. Another group of Bible scholars will answer: to till the land, to take care of the creation entrusted to us by God. They are right, too. Still others will focus on the Great Commission in their response. Please do not be surprised, but they are right as well. But I am as a simple and non-bookish person (at least, I would like to come to God in this status, without ranks, without diplomas, without shoulder straps and other regalia, to come to the Father as an unreasonable child who knows nothing). So, as a simple and non-bookish person, I can allow myself foolishness, if you do not mind even stupidity, and ask the question: what if a man is created in order to please the eye of God? What if my calling, my destiny is not to do something Great with varying degrees of greatness, but to give the Creator, who created me, the Father, who gave birth to me an aesthetic pleasure? What if I do not have to enjoy God? What if He wants to enjoy me? Then what about people who are unsightly, both inside and out? Could God make a mistake by creating an “ugly” person? On the other hand, is the problem just in that someone is not able to see the beauty of the one whom God created? So many questions! Moreover, the answers of theologians (I have nothing against them, since I myself sometimes write something about God) just provoke new questions in me. More questions! An avalanche of questions! Tsunami of questions! A volcano of questions followed by a brain blowing! (Might it be contrary? Brain blowing followed by questions…)

Moreover, suddenly, in the midst of all these questions, somewhere inside, an idea, a proposal, an image is born, sounding like an answer to the question about the purpose of butterflies and me:

There is a Testament of the Rainbow. Whenever you see a rainbow, you could remember that there won’t be a flood any more. There is a Testament of salt, which should remind that I preserved and life in a person is supported. Let it be the Testament of the Butterfly! Each time when you see a butterfly, remember that you are as this butterfly for God. You please Him even by the very fact of your existence. Moreover, for this purpose you are needed. For Him!

For none of us live to himself, and no man die to himself. For whether we live, we live unto the Lord; and whether we die, we die unto the Lord: whether we live therefore, or die, we belong to the Lord. (Rom.14:7,8)

2. The Glass and the Nail

Nail is a good thing! It conjoins and matches with many things. It can fasten the boards together — and the stool would be shaped. Alternatively, some type of rack. Moreover, even a frame for a picture by means of a nail might be shaped. Nail might be useful in building of a house. Not just one of course. In construction nice to have many nails in store. However, even one nail is a good thing! You can drive one nail into the wall and hang the picture on it. In frame. In the frame that shaped by means of another nail. Or you can hang a hat. If we are talking about hanging, then anything you want might be hanged on it.

Moreover, even an expensive mink coat. You might pierce holes in cardboard or leather with a nail. If there is no awl. Better, of course, to pierce with an awl, but we are now talking about a nail. And about making holes with it. You might even make holes in the picture. In the one that is framed with a nail. In the one that hangs on the nail. It could be done. Nevertheless, you do not have to. Because nail is not for damaging something. Isn’t it? A good thing is a nail! It matches many things. It gets along and has a way with many. As with a brick, and with a wood, so with a hat.

A glass is a good thing, too. Required. Useful. You might fill it with milk. Or with water. Or with water and with flowers. This is if the vases are not available. Or with soil and cactus. You might cut out circles of dough with a glass. Then bake cookies. You might put in a glass pencils and brushes. And you will get a creative organizer. There is such an odd word, overseas. Even two words. “Creative” and “organizer"***

***The given two words are borrowed from English language and are used in Russian (Translator’s Note).

Nevertheless, we are not talking about it now. We are talking about Glass now. A good thing is a Glass! It matches so many things. Better to put it this way, in the form of a question: What does it not match? It seems to be good for everything. Just like a nail.

But paired up — a nail and a glass — well, no way and nowhere… As a couple — they are hm.. Utterly worthless… To hammer a nail by glass? Or to hang a glass on a driven nail? Or to use a glass as a storage for a nail? Such a pair is good for nothing.

The same situation is about some people. Separately — they match so many individuals and get along with some by certain fast footwork and fancy ideas. But as a couple together, they are… well… outrage…

What is it all about? Well, these are all my thoughts, my meditations. Meditating on the theory of “halves”. Is just one very person match you as half? Or it could be anyone? Or, similarly as a nail? It might conjoin with a tree, with a picture, and with a brick. Except with a glass… Although the glass is good… Maybe this is the very requirement of compliance that God told us about. Do you remember? “The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” (Gen 2:18)

3. There is a way that SEEMS right to man…

Little David loved this phrase very much. The words sounded to him like a bedtime story, like a lullaby. He did not completely understand the meaning of these words, the core sense, because he was just eight years old. Whenever little David heard this quote from the Book of Solomon’s Proverbs, his child’s imagination painted a bright sunny picture of a golden ripe wheat field and cart harnessed with horse, snail-rolled along a hubby dirty muddy road. The mare lazily brushed aside annoying flies, the cart creaked with unlubricated wheels, the road ran in a straight endless line followed the setting sun over the horizon. Along the road from left to the right small field, daisies grew and small birds chirped. The idyll! Just one meter and one and a half meter roses were missed there, roses like in his Daddy’s store. However, these type of roses do not grow in the fields. Eight-year-old city boy knew it very well.

Why did the child’s imagination tell the eight-year-old David a dweller of a small European asphalt-concrete city, who never went anywhere further than the city square, and whose whole acquaintance with nature was limited to looking at sheep in a Bible for kids, why was this particular pastoral drawn on his inside canvas? What a question! Don’t you acknowledge, “The mind is a grey area object and could not be completely investigated”? Could it be because the word “seems” triggered a child’s imagination, just as pressing a button of night lamp by David’s bed turns it on? Therefore, David began to seem a mare, a cart, and green pastures. Alternatively, a little boy excited by the word “way”, which sounded in a child’s heart as a call to a journey whole of adventures and victories over dangers? So that with a princess salvation at the end of a heroic odyssey? What if the word “right” had such an impact on little David? Wow, what a word! Like a toy plastic arrow shot from a toy bow! Like the swing of a cardboard (cut out of a TV box and colored by hand) sword! Like a word of honor thrown in the face of a rascal and a scoundrel! Such a word of Chevalier, Musketeer, Robin Good!

Little David really wanted to become a grown up as a straight person, steady-going, without crookedness in his soul and confusion in thoughts. Direct in speech and acts. With no double bottom. With no falsity. In short — like his Daddy, the owner of a local flower shop and an Elder of the local church also.

David loved this Bible verse: there is a way that seems right to man. Rather, half of it. The beginning. Because little David did not like at all the second part of it, where it says something incomprehensible and unpleasant about death at the end of the road. When he heard the sounds of this notorious ending of the verse, the TV screen inside little David turned off, the wheels of the cart stopped creaking, and the daisies crumbled into dust. So that little David got back to the kitchen of his apartment, where his Daddy and the Pastor of the church, where little David attended every Sunday at Bible school for kids, sat at the table. They sat there and yet again argued about the meaning of Solomon’s Proverb, first part of which was so loved by eight-year-old boy.

“Read as it is read, Karl,” the father muttered, looking into the Pastor’s eyes, “no matter what you do, no matter what you strive for, you cannot avoid the end common for all human-beings — the death. Therefore, everything is vanity of vanities. There is no need to waste time and mental energy in pursuit of something more than what you have. There are ways that may look more attractive to us, may look straightforward, but the end is the same as the end of any other ways. Therefore, let us be happy with what we have. As Apostle Paul said: “For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. “(1 Tim. 6: 7, 8). Isn’t that so?”

“What are you talking about, Ezra?” — Answered Pastor Karl, — “This is about something completely different! About salvation, about eternity, about Christ himself! People tend to come up with their own ideas of ways for salvation and eternity. There are ways that seem right to people. Just enough to look at the abundance of existing religions. Even this is not enough for humans. Every day people come up with a new religion, reveal a New ‘Messiah’. This is self-deception. The end of such ways, such teachings, and such religions is eternal death! Only Christ, only Church makes salvation possible. You’d rather study in Seminary, and then you won’t make such mistakes in interpretation”.

“It’s too late for me to study, Pastor.” “It’s never too late to study, Brother Ezra! For instance, Moses began his active ministry at age of eighty. How old are you? Forty-two? It is the very time. " “Who’d support our family business? Okay, Karl, when little David will grow up, I’ll hand over my shop to him, and then would think about the Seminary”.

“Walk the talk, Ezra, I’ll hold you to that,” Pastor tried to hide a half-face satisfied smile in his bear.

Meanwhile, sitting on a stool little David thought to himself: “Both of you are wrong here. This is not about the Seminary, or about the Flower shop. It is about the horse and cart! Hey! It is so easy! “But little David was just eight years old and therefore he was not invited into adults’ disputes and his opinion was not asked. (However, both of them better should).

The years passed. Pastor Karl and Elder Ezra have already drunk a whole tank of tea. A kitchen chair replaced the kitchen stool, due to its wear and tear. Little David turned into David. Still there was no agreement on Solomon’s beloved parable. “Read it as it is read,” David’s Dad said in a bass voice. “What are you talking about?” — answered the Pastor. David thought: ‘‘you are both wrong, — and continued to himself:

“There are ways that seem right to man, because people are tend to self-deception. In order to avoid the way to symbolic death, so that people’s deeds would not turn out as fruitless, with no results, vain, dead, for that reason people need revelation, inspiration, vision from God! Only then, humans would be able to do what God expects them to, but not what they want. Ways that seems to be right are the intentions of people who do not know the God. The end of human ways is no result. It’s so easy!”

Little David turned into David and could already take part in a long-term conversations between two old friends. He could share his opinion. No one could forbidden him. But he did not want to sadden and upset neither his Dad nor Pastor because his understanding, his vision of his own life did not coincide with their vision of his life. With THEIR vision of HIS life. Over the years, David understood and learned by heart his Dad’s desire. Ezra’s vision was that David would be heir and the successor of the family business. At the same level. Flower shop in a small European town. Modest and biblical attitude. Karl’s vision for David was to become successful Missionary, the Founder of new churches, branch churches where aging Karl could come once a year as the Ghostly advisor of the Founder-Missionary. Bold and biblical attitude. As for David, he saw himself in his dreams and сloud castles… not a passenger of a creaky cart, slowly rolling on a hummocky dirt road in the middle of a golden ripe wheat field, no. David did not see himself as a missionary or a modest owner of a flower shop. David dreamed of a whole network of huge greenhouses, markets, logistics centers, millions of roses and tulips, delivered from Brittany in France to Kamchatka in Russia. About available orchids in Taimyr and Oimyakon.

In his dreams, David saw himself as not less than the World’s Emperor of carnations- chrysanthemums. Was it not the biblical approach? David also doubted whether such a desire was pleasing to God, his Dad and the Pastor… The clever books of venerable Christian writers noted completely different statements.. “Hold on to Your Dreams” he read in some and “Daydreaming from the devil,” he read in others. “The Great God has a Great Dream”, “Modesty is the main virtue of a virtuous Young man”, “Better to have less, but better” or “Expand your limits”… Poor David got completely confused and got the understanding: it was not his Daddy, but he himself urgently needed a Christian Education, so that this issue went on the appropriate shelf in his mind, So that not to go crazy and to get back his good sleep during the night and robust appetite during the day.

Pastor Carl rejoiced over David’s decision, because considered it, this decision, as a big step towards implementation of his (Pastor’s) missionary vision. David’s Dad also rejoiced over this decision, because he knew that the local seminary had a good course of Time and Financial Management. According to Ezra on this course, David will certainly be guided along the path of implementation of store “vision”. Thusly David ended up in an Educational Institution with the famous name “EU-wide Center of Training and Consulting programs for high-profile qualification of local servants of Christ the Savior, for short as EUWCOTACPFHPQOLSOCTS. (Hmm, it did not work out for short, sorry).

That is how David ended up in EUWCOTA… My word! It is really ties the tongue in knots! Let us call it simply: the Center. David was in the Center. Not in the center of attention, not in the center of actions, he was at the Training Center. Of course he ended up there not alone. Around two dozens of alike fellows were desperately seeking the Will of God for their lives, definitely seeking the Will of cosmic scale. Two dozen of students were sitting with David in the same auditorium. Professors taught David in this very Center that for any large-scale ministry, strong and durable home front is required, as a wife-helper. After all, it is not a secret for anyone that behind every successful man there is always a woman who led him to success, isn’t it? Behind every millionaire, behind every politician, behind every champion… So David began to look around: who could lead him to the fulfillment of his wishes? To whom can he entrust his Eurasian business with the prospect of exit over the ocean? There was one girl in their group. Well, not bad at all. Pigtails. Eyes. Lips. Manicure. Makeup. Well, and she looked at the David’s direction somehow, in special way. Not with tenderness yet, but with an inexplicable brilliance. It was later when David realized that it was the shining of her contact lenses. There was another one. Not bad as well. She looked at David somehow in special way, as well. It was later when David found out that she had a cast in her eye, and this made her look seem so unusual. It seemed not just for David, but also for the rest of his mates. (It seemed… Again this favorite word from his childhood… about right paths, about a mare, about daisies, about ripe wheat… Awe…)